Original post: July, 2008
The moon and I
Today I went to the Tivoli Mall in Santa Barbara do Oeste, and being that prior, the children and I went to the Observatory site, from Americana. We have seen the Jupiter planet (unforgettable) and the full moon up close (they said its brightness hindered the vision of the stars) …
I couldn’t let thinking: A long time we dreamed about stars, and where do we exactly step into?
At the mall, place chosen by the majority of middle class by its security and quiet shopping, we eat, go window shopping, you see people who dress much the same way and movies with wacky trailers.
Thinking about this all consumption is not difficult to project where so much garbage produced by both generations will stop. Probably the recyclable sector won’t stand…
There are plenty of plastic cups, many cans of cola, many tickets and debt credit card and many cigarette butts. Our species probably arrived at the height of its power to buy …
There are projections, especially from Mr. Algor, eco-political duty, denouncing it in the next few years maybe the machine with which I type no longer has a use and worse, we won’t be able to see the glow of the planet Jupiter and its two rings …
Thinking that Galileo faced a stark court and he was confined to his house because he wanted to prove the heliocentric… I believe that Italian, fascinated by the heavens, saw far more than our generation who have cell phones and plasma TVs, but they lost their perspective Free charm of seeing parts of the universe and to see a little more closely at the moon still unpolluted…
domingo, 26 de dezembro de 2010
domingo, 28 de novembro de 2010
The body, the prison and school break that I won’t have
Thursday, July 17, 2008
The body, the prison and school break that I won’t have
Today is my first day “almost on holiday”, due to a slight strike, we from the school administration, ran out of recess. I thought why does a human being need to stop, if everything in the universe is moving?
Well! Maybe people stop or want to stop because they are tired of the “same” and routine lead us to boredom, or perhaps we decided to stop when the body, up for having significant mechanical parts, though not a mechanic, is tired… If it gets tired … tired of always have done the same or simply have done too much, It has produced or been waiting for long time …
Gyms require the body, at work the same our “I” also requires that body, is not there a moment when he says: ” Let me grow old, tiring, resting, dying, because I have already given my time to the world … We always think we know everything about our body from birth. We try to control it and condition it. We try to impose the reason and what we conceive to be correct about it and never heard their need than hunger, gender and aesthetics …
It has its own language and wisdom confusing in the light of reason.
“It is a great expert on yourself, when it feels needs madden us up to be serviced, It knows the medicine and how to heal itself…Pity our evolution has as price manipulation of the physical substance …The more we study, articulate, the most impedes communication between body and mind ..
Socrates said that “the body is the prison of the soul,” but it’s so efficient that causes us full sympathy, isn’t it?
I truly believe it is a prison, however well planned and comrade, that does everything to bring about our well being… Not to mention that most will not run out of that prison…
It is very likely that this body, for some pride for others shame, It also knows when to stop, although we don’t respect all their wishes as well as their natural aging and expected, worthy of those who served in the best possible way, all penalties imposed since the dawn of civilization…
I’m still 39. I want to stop parts of the body and others into shape. Nevertheless, I would give the deserved rest at the time that my body requires it…
The body, the prison and school break that I won’t have
Today is my first day “almost on holiday”, due to a slight strike, we from the school administration, ran out of recess. I thought why does a human being need to stop, if everything in the universe is moving?
Well! Maybe people stop or want to stop because they are tired of the “same” and routine lead us to boredom, or perhaps we decided to stop when the body, up for having significant mechanical parts, though not a mechanic, is tired… If it gets tired … tired of always have done the same or simply have done too much, It has produced or been waiting for long time …
Gyms require the body, at work the same our “I” also requires that body, is not there a moment when he says: ” Let me grow old, tiring, resting, dying, because I have already given my time to the world … We always think we know everything about our body from birth. We try to control it and condition it. We try to impose the reason and what we conceive to be correct about it and never heard their need than hunger, gender and aesthetics …
It has its own language and wisdom confusing in the light of reason.
“It is a great expert on yourself, when it feels needs madden us up to be serviced, It knows the medicine and how to heal itself…Pity our evolution has as price manipulation of the physical substance …The more we study, articulate, the most impedes communication between body and mind ..
Socrates said that “the body is the prison of the soul,” but it’s so efficient that causes us full sympathy, isn’t it?
I truly believe it is a prison, however well planned and comrade, that does everything to bring about our well being… Not to mention that most will not run out of that prison…
It is very likely that this body, for some pride for others shame, It also knows when to stop, although we don’t respect all their wishes as well as their natural aging and expected, worthy of those who served in the best possible way, all penalties imposed since the dawn of civilization…
I’m still 39. I want to stop parts of the body and others into shape. Nevertheless, I would give the deserved rest at the time that my body requires it…
segunda-feira, 15 de novembro de 2010
Children
Monday, June 30, 2008
Children
I have two children Caio and Letícia. I protect them and I almost never know the dosage that.
My mother’s instinct has developed slowly, wasn’t automatic. So I’m thinking about past mistakes, what was correct or not.
They fight a lot, perhaps because sexual difference, perhaps perchance to the horoscope, or maybe because the socialization depends not only hormones, but the experience.
Seeing the news, we all fear for our children. Global forecasts are not as good: the same territorial disputes, too many people on the planet, too much garbage to the point of having no more landfills, however, remains strong, the need to propagate our genes.
Henceforth, children are more than a continuation of DNA, are narcissistic projections. At one point we always try to “come” inside them and live by them.
Of course there is the natural time of separation, as in the Madonna song “Papa do not Preach”, but we are so used to govern the terms someone who shocks us with any threat of rebellion in our home.
Antagonistically, parallel to that super-protect, postmodernism has led to an exaggerated individualism where the family itself exclude their children …
The working world doesn’t “contain” children unless they also produce or confirm the expectation of their parents.
I know that this practice will change anti-existential, perhaps when decreasing the number of children in homes, and when the work of the woman or the man inside the house is valued more than the practice of having two or three jobs for money and power consuming the excess garbage that will turn one day …
I only have two kids and I see the complexity of creating them. I know I must guide them to the world, as this is much bigger than me. For now try to solve the problem of respect between blood brothers.
Original from: www.diariodececiliaonline.blogspot.com
Children
I have two children Caio and Letícia. I protect them and I almost never know the dosage that.
My mother’s instinct has developed slowly, wasn’t automatic. So I’m thinking about past mistakes, what was correct or not.
They fight a lot, perhaps because sexual difference, perhaps perchance to the horoscope, or maybe because the socialization depends not only hormones, but the experience.
Seeing the news, we all fear for our children. Global forecasts are not as good: the same territorial disputes, too many people on the planet, too much garbage to the point of having no more landfills, however, remains strong, the need to propagate our genes.
Henceforth, children are more than a continuation of DNA, are narcissistic projections. At one point we always try to “come” inside them and live by them.
Of course there is the natural time of separation, as in the Madonna song “Papa do not Preach”, but we are so used to govern the terms someone who shocks us with any threat of rebellion in our home.
Antagonistically, parallel to that super-protect, postmodernism has led to an exaggerated individualism where the family itself exclude their children …
The working world doesn’t “contain” children unless they also produce or confirm the expectation of their parents.
I know that this practice will change anti-existential, perhaps when decreasing the number of children in homes, and when the work of the woman or the man inside the house is valued more than the practice of having two or three jobs for money and power consuming the excess garbage that will turn one day …
I only have two kids and I see the complexity of creating them. I know I must guide them to the world, as this is much bigger than me. For now try to solve the problem of respect between blood brothers.
Original from: www.diariodececiliaonline.blogspot.com
domingo, 14 de novembro de 2010
Incorruptible bodies
Wenesday, June 18, 2008
Incorruptible bodies
During those days I've been seeing on Youtube, perhaps from a morbid part of me, so-called "incorruptible bodies" that have come centuries but don’t decompose. In Catholicism as there are several of the Blessed Bernadette in France. They say that Fernando Pessoa was also his body intact, 50 years after his death.
It’s interesting try to understand the physical body as autonomous, as if It breathed alone even lifeless motor.
I don’t know if there are chemical conditions that may favor or if it is our destiny to become dust...
It’s complex look at a mirror and see the logical time of the meat as it is very difficult to look at a cold and lifeless body and think why It didn’t wake up.
However our body fulfills several functions for which hardly gets bonus: Anyone who has watched on their little toes? Co - responsible for our movements and our morning run …
A decomposing body shows us that is dead by its appearance? But there are living people who seem to walk with dead bodies?
Really our eyes, live, look for equal, although similar to cheat...
Incorruptible bodies
During those days I've been seeing on Youtube, perhaps from a morbid part of me, so-called "incorruptible bodies" that have come centuries but don’t decompose. In Catholicism as there are several of the Blessed Bernadette in France. They say that Fernando Pessoa was also his body intact, 50 years after his death.
It’s interesting try to understand the physical body as autonomous, as if It breathed alone even lifeless motor.
I don’t know if there are chemical conditions that may favor or if it is our destiny to become dust...
It’s complex look at a mirror and see the logical time of the meat as it is very difficult to look at a cold and lifeless body and think why It didn’t wake up.
However our body fulfills several functions for which hardly gets bonus: Anyone who has watched on their little toes? Co - responsible for our movements and our morning run …
A decomposing body shows us that is dead by its appearance? But there are living people who seem to walk with dead bodies?
Really our eyes, live, look for equal, although similar to cheat...
segunda-feira, 17 de maio de 2010
The future of an adult
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
The future of an adult
On Friday, a temperamental student commented "My future is what matters to me." He has 16 years and I was just wondering ...
When I was 16 I thought the future was to become adults, marry, procreate, work, etc. All this came. Perhaps say that the future is growing old is not pessimism.
If we understand how, in the neo-liberal policy, that the future revolves around goals and objectives, then the future falls in what Shoppenhauer says that’s is pain and boredom. But if we understand that the future comes anyway, so we're just simplistic.
It’s strange, everything in us is so complex, inside and out. Thus, by association of ideas we complex the years that haven’t come yet and whatever we may provide, little or nothing could guess because everything somehow always seems different or sovereign.
Aging is the real future that we dare not imagine. We look around ancient buildings, but we ourselves could not imagine us centenarians ...
Aging is like losing dignity or identity.
With new technologies and hormones synthesized maybe we extrapolate from this appearance, perhaps it can last up to more. We don’t know yet what would be arrive at sixty years healthy, handsome and totally ready to diverse works ( will we extend the functional life span? ). Living so long (with the help of medicine), being beautiful for longer, make babies at 70, how would it be? How would it be to pass of hundred-year with frequency for the species?
The appearance postmodern attempts to override the nature fair and clear, in principles, and from this shock emerge the reflection: How will be the future of an adult?
The future of an adult
On Friday, a temperamental student commented "My future is what matters to me." He has 16 years and I was just wondering ...
When I was 16 I thought the future was to become adults, marry, procreate, work, etc. All this came. Perhaps say that the future is growing old is not pessimism.
If we understand how, in the neo-liberal policy, that the future revolves around goals and objectives, then the future falls in what Shoppenhauer says that’s is pain and boredom. But if we understand that the future comes anyway, so we're just simplistic.
It’s strange, everything in us is so complex, inside and out. Thus, by association of ideas we complex the years that haven’t come yet and whatever we may provide, little or nothing could guess because everything somehow always seems different or sovereign.
Aging is the real future that we dare not imagine. We look around ancient buildings, but we ourselves could not imagine us centenarians ...
Aging is like losing dignity or identity.
With new technologies and hormones synthesized maybe we extrapolate from this appearance, perhaps it can last up to more. We don’t know yet what would be arrive at sixty years healthy, handsome and totally ready to diverse works ( will we extend the functional life span? ). Living so long (with the help of medicine), being beautiful for longer, make babies at 70, how would it be? How would it be to pass of hundred-year with frequency for the species?
The appearance postmodern attempts to override the nature fair and clear, in principles, and from this shock emerge the reflection: How will be the future of an adult?
Much work, little leisure
Monday, June 2, 2008
Much work, little leisure
Today my departure time was at 10:00 , I left at 10:15, but don’t know why I did not like the faces of my managers who seemed, in other hand, they haven’t enjoyed the time I was leaving.
This school is still nice, at the point where they notice our good work, but there were others however we did, it was like having done nothing.
It also occurred to me, in my childhood, much as I did my mom was there totally dissatisfied.
Also work on weekends from 9:00 to 13:00, in a program called the Family School. There, is very good, full of tired college students, but hopeful. However, I just see my boyfriend at the times left over and I'm not sleeping.
In the eighteenth century and in Brazil until Getúlio Vargas, the people worked until 18 hours, and also they were not noticed and did not have many rights. Then came laws and regulated the work, before servile, now salaried worker. But did modern people begin to work less? For a while yes, but then the desire to have car, home, land, clothes, jeans, etc. was higher and free will, everyone decided to have more than one job and less time for leisure.
The song by the Skank, "The road only exists when you pass."
In fact, we choose to work and work hard, we believe that quality of life can only improve if the money comes. Today leisure is almost vagabond ...
Much work, little leisure
Today my departure time was at 10:00 , I left at 10:15, but don’t know why I did not like the faces of my managers who seemed, in other hand, they haven’t enjoyed the time I was leaving.
This school is still nice, at the point where they notice our good work, but there were others however we did, it was like having done nothing.
It also occurred to me, in my childhood, much as I did my mom was there totally dissatisfied.
Also work on weekends from 9:00 to 13:00, in a program called the Family School. There, is very good, full of tired college students, but hopeful. However, I just see my boyfriend at the times left over and I'm not sleeping.
In the eighteenth century and in Brazil until Getúlio Vargas, the people worked until 18 hours, and also they were not noticed and did not have many rights. Then came laws and regulated the work, before servile, now salaried worker. But did modern people begin to work less? For a while yes, but then the desire to have car, home, land, clothes, jeans, etc. was higher and free will, everyone decided to have more than one job and less time for leisure.
The song by the Skank, "The road only exists when you pass."
In fact, we choose to work and work hard, we believe that quality of life can only improve if the money comes. Today leisure is almost vagabond ...
Comunication
Monday, May 26, 2008
Communication
Back from holiday, back to work … A struggle to raise children at 6.30 a m to go to school. Now at home, before leaving the house in order, I'm trying to resist eating a chocolate that is likely to passport about two pounds more. I don’t know if I'm difficult, if we are difficult or if the human specie is difficult. After much choosing and being chosen, now called the Age of Reason, which is the frontal cortex that guides actions and no more hormones. Here comes a relationship. Everything is very good, although he and I are tough, we all want to keep our reasons, don’t we? And in the difficult and useless art of trying to keep our opinions, sometimes we lose people. They say that all couples, even if not married, they contest themselves. Interesting that when there aren’t more challengers, it seems to have lost our reason for existence. Many people isolate themselves without knowing, therefore arrive a level of divinity where all others are "less". It’s Interesting, if you understand the anatomy of the brain, for example, you will see that there is no use billions of neurons. If they do not communicate or interact the organ loses its function ... Everything is a matter of communication ... Many loves leave frustrated without knowing how much were lovers ...
Communication
Back from holiday, back to work … A struggle to raise children at 6.30 a m to go to school. Now at home, before leaving the house in order, I'm trying to resist eating a chocolate that is likely to passport about two pounds more. I don’t know if I'm difficult, if we are difficult or if the human specie is difficult. After much choosing and being chosen, now called the Age of Reason, which is the frontal cortex that guides actions and no more hormones. Here comes a relationship. Everything is very good, although he and I are tough, we all want to keep our reasons, don’t we? And in the difficult and useless art of trying to keep our opinions, sometimes we lose people. They say that all couples, even if not married, they contest themselves. Interesting that when there aren’t more challengers, it seems to have lost our reason for existence. Many people isolate themselves without knowing, therefore arrive a level of divinity where all others are "less". It’s Interesting, if you understand the anatomy of the brain, for example, you will see that there is no use billions of neurons. If they do not communicate or interact the organ loses its function ... Everything is a matter of communication ... Many loves leave frustrated without knowing how much were lovers ...
The secret post-holiday
Friday, May 23, 2008
The Secret post-holiday
Today is post-holiday, I woke up at 9:00 p m …
I made that mentoring described in "The Secret". One where we imagine a house of
$ 1,000,000.00, an imported car Honda, tip line, all debts paid ( old creditors now cocking you ), an income paycheck of $ 10,000.00, a job where no longer have to die in combat, Brazilian taxes going down for the middle class, a body in shape, in other words, everything that is currently impossible ... According to supporters of the laws of mentalization or spreadsheets from goal, every desire is perfectly possible.
These supporters say the world is from everyone and everything here belongs to everyone.
Well, if you analyze the Bible, It says, " humbled will be exalted and the exalted shall be humbled," "Trust me, your God" ...
Historically these assumptions proceed . See the Egyptians ruled the world for 5000 years. Rules the roost and enslaved the Jews ... Besides them, the Middle ages also enslaved them, robbed them, etc. and now they are in power and Israel is the stronger state of the world, after all since the 60's fight against world Arab and wins ...
Now the Americans are in economic crisis, something the world of common sense neither had imagined as. Without saying that there is an african descent, Obama, as president, after so many martyrs like Martin Luther King and the Ku Klus Klan.
In Brazil “the old left”, so persecuted, is in power. “The ancient right”, so full of rules in the 60s, is in power. ..
Without telling that nowadays anyone, in earlier decades doomed to oblivion, may have their ten minutes of fame through channels like YouTube and Orkut. And all without being a millionaire, which somehow takes the fame of artists such as Brad Pitt ...
Really need the "Secret" came out at least in salary, the amount of $ 1000.000,00 wait anymore ... Maybe that page is read a day?
I conclude with a famous phrase from the most graceful I could read, Millor Fernandes: "Dictatorship is when you order, democracy is that when I command."
The Secret post-holiday
Today is post-holiday, I woke up at 9:00 p m …
I made that mentoring described in "The Secret". One where we imagine a house of
$ 1,000,000.00, an imported car Honda, tip line, all debts paid ( old creditors now cocking you ), an income paycheck of $ 10,000.00, a job where no longer have to die in combat, Brazilian taxes going down for the middle class, a body in shape, in other words, everything that is currently impossible ... According to supporters of the laws of mentalization or spreadsheets from goal, every desire is perfectly possible.
These supporters say the world is from everyone and everything here belongs to everyone.
Well, if you analyze the Bible, It says, " humbled will be exalted and the exalted shall be humbled," "Trust me, your God" ...
Historically these assumptions proceed . See the Egyptians ruled the world for 5000 years. Rules the roost and enslaved the Jews ... Besides them, the Middle ages also enslaved them, robbed them, etc. and now they are in power and Israel is the stronger state of the world, after all since the 60's fight against world Arab and wins ...
Now the Americans are in economic crisis, something the world of common sense neither had imagined as. Without saying that there is an african descent, Obama, as president, after so many martyrs like Martin Luther King and the Ku Klus Klan.
In Brazil “the old left”, so persecuted, is in power. “The ancient right”, so full of rules in the 60s, is in power. ..
Without telling that nowadays anyone, in earlier decades doomed to oblivion, may have their ten minutes of fame through channels like YouTube and Orkut. And all without being a millionaire, which somehow takes the fame of artists such as Brad Pitt ...
Really need the "Secret" came out at least in salary, the amount of $ 1000.000,00 wait anymore ... Maybe that page is read a day?
I conclude with a famous phrase from the most graceful I could read, Millor Fernandes: "Dictatorship is when you order, democracy is that when I command."
quarta-feira, 5 de maio de 2010
Scorpion
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Scorpion
I was supposed to have gone to school to pick the children up. I haven’t gone because they are both in recovery (up seems to "Eduardo and Mônica from Legião Urbana)
I am astrologically native of Scorpio. Hmm! Some say we're rancorous, vindictive and we’ve not forgotten anything. But only those who are Scorpios?
I don’t know!
In my childhood I got very angry with the domineering attitudes of my mother who used the psychopath as an instrument of correction. She didn’t allow questions. She also did not allow we cried while she spanked us, which infuriated me internally. My father was just a masterful, but we hardly ever spoke because we almost never had issue ...
Then I was thinking of a future independence, as well as thinking about death as liberation.
In adolescence I kept brooding sadness of my childhood. Sometimes I thought we at home we had reach the limit of our relationship and I should leave …
After I started working somehow things have changed. Interestingly the money, even minimum wage, changes the relationships a lot. Up to today, they didn’t invented a faster seduction but perhaps not efficient.
I ended up marrying around 23. I had two children and I divorced after 30 years. I decided to try to return to the maternal home, but was refused. My child anger forgotten get back again …
But eventually, I ended up alone, overcoming a depression of four years, returning to work and walking to an economic independence. That said, I returned to have contact with my mother since my father died in 1995 and until a few days before we had nothing to say.
Sometimes we think the "bad luck" of having strong personalities, but sometimes I don’t know what to think.
I don’t know but I could never forget grievances or differences exchanged. I don’t like to see someone who mobbed me going through the same process, but I confess that I get happy when I see that there was justice.
It’s difficult, isn’t it? Narciso just think beautiful what is mirror. He only sees the hurts they caused, however, doesn’t remember what He has already caused.
It is very difficult to self-analysis. The easier criticism is always in the other direction.
Will It be true our gene is really selfish?
Well I asked that question, Am I selfish?
A lot things happen as torture, rape, violence of any sort and do I remember things from 30 years ago? Yes, I remember because maybe I really have some selfish. Nietzsche said that if his finger hurts no matter what your friend's hand is severed. It seems that we were designed for self-survival where the other only has value when it offers some help.
I can not say if astrology is correct or I’d believe more in Astronomy … But at least they also say that Scorpios are famous for their sensuality, not just by their anger ... rs
Scorpion
I was supposed to have gone to school to pick the children up. I haven’t gone because they are both in recovery (up seems to "Eduardo and Mônica from Legião Urbana)
I am astrologically native of Scorpio. Hmm! Some say we're rancorous, vindictive and we’ve not forgotten anything. But only those who are Scorpios?
I don’t know!
In my childhood I got very angry with the domineering attitudes of my mother who used the psychopath as an instrument of correction. She didn’t allow questions. She also did not allow we cried while she spanked us, which infuriated me internally. My father was just a masterful, but we hardly ever spoke because we almost never had issue ...
Then I was thinking of a future independence, as well as thinking about death as liberation.
In adolescence I kept brooding sadness of my childhood. Sometimes I thought we at home we had reach the limit of our relationship and I should leave …
After I started working somehow things have changed. Interestingly the money, even minimum wage, changes the relationships a lot. Up to today, they didn’t invented a faster seduction but perhaps not efficient.
I ended up marrying around 23. I had two children and I divorced after 30 years. I decided to try to return to the maternal home, but was refused. My child anger forgotten get back again …
But eventually, I ended up alone, overcoming a depression of four years, returning to work and walking to an economic independence. That said, I returned to have contact with my mother since my father died in 1995 and until a few days before we had nothing to say.
Sometimes we think the "bad luck" of having strong personalities, but sometimes I don’t know what to think.
I don’t know but I could never forget grievances or differences exchanged. I don’t like to see someone who mobbed me going through the same process, but I confess that I get happy when I see that there was justice.
It’s difficult, isn’t it? Narciso just think beautiful what is mirror. He only sees the hurts they caused, however, doesn’t remember what He has already caused.
It is very difficult to self-analysis. The easier criticism is always in the other direction.
Will It be true our gene is really selfish?
Well I asked that question, Am I selfish?
A lot things happen as torture, rape, violence of any sort and do I remember things from 30 years ago? Yes, I remember because maybe I really have some selfish. Nietzsche said that if his finger hurts no matter what your friend's hand is severed. It seems that we were designed for self-survival where the other only has value when it offers some help.
I can not say if astrology is correct or I’d believe more in Astronomy … But at least they also say that Scorpios are famous for their sensuality, not just by their anger ... rs
segunda-feira, 22 de março de 2010
The only thing that's left from adolescence is the music
Tuesday, May 20th, 2008
The only thing that's left from adolescence is the music
Today I had a busy day at work, then I came home and organized some part of the house, so I could get the children at school. I didn't had time to prepare anything to eat, so we went to a snack house and ate a lot of junkie food, which we couldn't have eaten. Ah, and we had some juice too. Actually, this way I spend a lot more money than normal.
When we got home, I was talking with Leticia and Caio about my adolescence and it's music. The music from the 80's.
I never thought I could see my idols again on youtube, and even choose which one to play first.
My generation has suffered the lack of knoledge about sex, the depression from not to understand what the aduldts didn't explain. But at least we had a lot of great songs, and musicians, like Legião Urbana, Gang 90, between others...
That songs made us happy, gave shape to our emotions and made the wait less exhausting.
Back then, in Campinas, there was two ice-cream shops, one named Brunella and the other Castelo. There the teenagers used to meet eatch other friends. I suffered a lot because my parents didn't let me go out much, and I used to sneak out to go there quickly. I had the feeling that I was watching my life passing by, just like a soap-opera.
At school I tried to create my freedom, changed from early to night classes, and with the night, the friends, I met the exciting essence of being free. Then, I realized that freedom continues with the consequences that happen after it. For example, I started smoking, Hollywood generation. This was a way we could scream our independence, includding me in a new group, made of friends. Well, I only noticed with 30 years old that this smoking industry that gave us independence make us pay much more than we should.
I thought I was always losing everything, there was a boy from high school called Tutu... honestly, only as an adult I realized that waiting is useless and that pain is never enough or are always too little...
however, it lies in this path made of hormones and changing economy the whole that makes us what we are today.
Adolescence is a very fragile time, with undeniable and endless feelings that one day become memories.
Almost every woman wants to go back to when beauty and esthetics are natural, even when they know that the present makes us women. It's hard to go back to 45kg, and almost every man wants the vigor they have with 16 years. But we can't go back to 16.
However, we can feel the same things listening to the songs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io1Wu9ASUn0&NR=1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaunNDIkDYw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YIrwblUdac&feature=related
By 6h30PM I'll be back to work. I always let myself go late. This is my organizational error, and I'll go with one of these songs on my mind.
When we got home, I was talking with Leticia and Caio about my adolescence and it's music. The music from the 80's.
I never thought I could see my idols again on youtube, and even choose which one to play first.
My generation has suffered the lack of knoledge about sex, the depression from not to understand what the aduldts didn't explain. But at least we had a lot of great songs, and musicians, like Legião Urbana, Gang 90, between others...
That songs made us happy, gave shape to our emotions and made the wait less exhausting.
Back then, in Campinas, there was two ice-cream shops, one named Brunella and the other Castelo. There the teenagers used to meet eatch other friends. I suffered a lot because my parents didn't let me go out much, and I used to sneak out to go there quickly. I had the feeling that I was watching my life passing by, just like a soap-opera.
At school I tried to create my freedom, changed from early to night classes, and with the night, the friends, I met the exciting essence of being free. Then, I realized that freedom continues with the consequences that happen after it. For example, I started smoking, Hollywood generation. This was a way we could scream our independence, includding me in a new group, made of friends. Well, I only noticed with 30 years old that this smoking industry that gave us independence make us pay much more than we should.
I thought I was always losing everything, there was a boy from high school called Tutu... honestly, only as an adult I realized that waiting is useless and that pain is never enough or are always too little...
however, it lies in this path made of hormones and changing economy the whole that makes us what we are today.
Adolescence is a very fragile time, with undeniable and endless feelings that one day become memories.
Almost every woman wants to go back to when beauty and esthetics are natural, even when they know that the present makes us women. It's hard to go back to 45kg, and almost every man wants the vigor they have with 16 years. But we can't go back to 16.
However, we can feel the same things listening to the songs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io1Wu9ASUn0&NR=1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaunNDIkDYw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YIrwblUdac&feature=related
By 6h30PM I'll be back to work. I always let myself go late. This is my organizational error, and I'll go with one of these songs on my mind.
sábado, 20 de março de 2010
Organization
Monday, May 19th, 2008
Organization
Today was the open house and everything was quite in a hurry. I did it all with the help of de director and Noemia, a kind coordinator. I saw a lot of profiles of students, each one with a picture, a lot of them with "quitter" written on it... Then I kept looking those profiles and thought: What happened to this kids? Where have they been?Unfortunately, the children rights are often tyranized by the adults. They are careless in a time that even ECA (children estatute) is stablished.It's right that the young keep together and learn with the adults of their species, but how long should the young human beings be under the rules of adults? Anyway, it's told that without rules, our species wouldn't have survived. Our evolution is completely based on the basics of rules and organization. The open house was quite difficult to me, because I was having trouble to understand the most technical parts. It has always been this way, I'm a very dispersive person, and usually need to organize myself better... Organization to learn.
Organization
Today was the open house and everything was quite in a hurry. I did it all with the help of de director and Noemia, a kind coordinator. I saw a lot of profiles of students, each one with a picture, a lot of them with "quitter" written on it... Then I kept looking those profiles and thought: What happened to this kids? Where have they been?Unfortunately, the children rights are often tyranized by the adults. They are careless in a time that even ECA (children estatute) is stablished.It's right that the young keep together and learn with the adults of their species, but how long should the young human beings be under the rules of adults? Anyway, it's told that without rules, our species wouldn't have survived. Our evolution is completely based on the basics of rules and organization. The open house was quite difficult to me, because I was having trouble to understand the most technical parts. It has always been this way, I'm a very dispersive person, and usually need to organize myself better... Organization to learn.
sexta-feira, 19 de março de 2010
Few minutes for May 19th.
Sunday, May 18th, 2008
Few minutes for May 19th.
It's Funny, when I was a kid, I couldn't imagine I would get to the new century, and this idea seemed some kind of absurd. I remember a class that I took on the fifth grade, elementary school, in 1980, when a history teacher named Maria Rita once told us: "All of you are young now, and was born at the end of the 20th century which is nearly at it's end. In the future, others will tell you you're from the past century."
I thought about it that time, but thinking about something twenty years from now is kind of dificult for a child, so i didn't thought about it anymore, until now...
It's weird how we deal with time: sometimes you have plenty of it, and then, all of a sudden, you don't have any to deal with, only the idea of having more.
Today I woke up on a hurry, as usual, went to work at the Family School, which work on saturdays and sundays. Later at home, I started some chores, waiting for my children and ex-husband.
Didn't know what to do first, almost got mad trying to stop time, almost gave up, noticing that I lost my battle with time, since trying to organizing it meant dealing with a lot of chores, none of them less important than another.
Only now, at 00h27 Have I done 3/4 of what I had to do, and feel a kind of remorse for the things I didn't do.
Some people usualy mistakes the notion of time and life, but should we consider them synonyms?
My boyfriend Artur says that time passes trhough us, not the opposite. Anyway, for most of the women who hadn't sister Dulce's gifts, time is winner in an unfair fight against esthetics and our struggle will never be awarded.
Well, as time passes, we lose in appearance but gain in experience, joy and a lot of good laughs to remember, we learn to understand and comprehend others. Taking a look over time is the methaphysics and history!
I thought about it that time, but thinking about something twenty years from now is kind of dificult for a child, so i didn't thought about it anymore, until now...
It's weird how we deal with time: sometimes you have plenty of it, and then, all of a sudden, you don't have any to deal with, only the idea of having more.
Today I woke up on a hurry, as usual, went to work at the Family School, which work on saturdays and sundays. Later at home, I started some chores, waiting for my children and ex-husband.
Didn't know what to do first, almost got mad trying to stop time, almost gave up, noticing that I lost my battle with time, since trying to organizing it meant dealing with a lot of chores, none of them less important than another.
Only now, at 00h27 Have I done 3/4 of what I had to do, and feel a kind of remorse for the things I didn't do.
Some people usualy mistakes the notion of time and life, but should we consider them synonyms?
My boyfriend Artur says that time passes trhough us, not the opposite. Anyway, for most of the women who hadn't sister Dulce's gifts, time is winner in an unfair fight against esthetics and our struggle will never be awarded.
Well, as time passes, we lose in appearance but gain in experience, joy and a lot of good laughs to remember, we learn to understand and comprehend others. Taking a look over time is the methaphysics and history!
quinta-feira, 18 de março de 2010
No sleep
Wednsday, May 14th, 2008
No sleep.
I didn't sleep tonight (from yesterday to today), thinking about the earthquake that hit China and Zaire, and about the maya civilization prophecies that tell the live in the world can end in 2012. I thought about some mistakes and things did right that made possible that i could have thoughts...
I went to school without having any sleep at all, I had a schedule, and nothing ended up the way I planned. IN fact, it's very common, despite what people think, that we which work in public education departments usually have to do a lot of things as fast as possible to complete our schedule. I start to do somehing and someone calls me. I was only a philosofy theacher, but now i'm a coordenator, and my job seems to be mind people needs and mediate.
A lot of changes have been occuring and sometimes we get a little lost.
However, i placed a text in the pannel the other day, thinking about cheering up everyone. "The eagle and the chicken" by Leonardo Boff. There is shown the situation of a farmer used to routine. He raised chicken, and someday, he found an eaglet in a nest. But since he's never been out of his farm, he didn't know what an eagle was, nor even what kind of bird was that. So, he raised the eagle with the other chickens, until a naturalist found it and, noticing that is was not a chicken, took it to the open fields so it could fly. The eagle was not secure enough to fly, missing the protection of the poultry yard, where it has food whenever it wants. Then, the naturalist took it to a high mount and threw the bird without thinking twice. The eagle thought it would die, but it flew.
From the highs he saw the poultry yard, very small on the ground so far, and it noticed that it was a waste of time, being locked up there.
So, is the whole of a teacher being this boring naturalist? the one who recognizes an eagle, or some eagles and make them fly without question?
No human being was designed to look down the floor and eat seeds, while it has the possibility to reach the skies.
I went to school without having any sleep at all, I had a schedule, and nothing ended up the way I planned. IN fact, it's very common, despite what people think, that we which work in public education departments usually have to do a lot of things as fast as possible to complete our schedule. I start to do somehing and someone calls me. I was only a philosofy theacher, but now i'm a coordenator, and my job seems to be mind people needs and mediate.
A lot of changes have been occuring and sometimes we get a little lost.
However, i placed a text in the pannel the other day, thinking about cheering up everyone. "The eagle and the chicken" by Leonardo Boff. There is shown the situation of a farmer used to routine. He raised chicken, and someday, he found an eaglet in a nest. But since he's never been out of his farm, he didn't know what an eagle was, nor even what kind of bird was that. So, he raised the eagle with the other chickens, until a naturalist found it and, noticing that is was not a chicken, took it to the open fields so it could fly. The eagle was not secure enough to fly, missing the protection of the poultry yard, where it has food whenever it wants. Then, the naturalist took it to a high mount and threw the bird without thinking twice. The eagle thought it would die, but it flew.
From the highs he saw the poultry yard, very small on the ground so far, and it noticed that it was a waste of time, being locked up there.
So, is the whole of a teacher being this boring naturalist? the one who recognizes an eagle, or some eagles and make them fly without question?
No human being was designed to look down the floor and eat seeds, while it has the possibility to reach the skies.
quarta-feira, 17 de março de 2010
1968
Thursday, May 8th, 2008
1968
I was born in 1968. I beleive this was a special year, when the Student's Revolution in Paris have ocurred, huge manifestations of the UNE and the murder of Martin Luther King, in Memphis.
In Brazil, the Military Dictatorship ruled with power, while the socialist or the politized resistance tried to mantain themselves alive, just like a fish, struggling for life when out of water, trying to go back to where it's free to live.
I think this kind of "revolutionary spirit" has become a part of, or at least something that bothers inside me.
1968 was a year that shaked the world. Maybe the anthitesis of a system. Though revolutions make part in history of humanity, that year has probably proved that people are not completely alienated, stactic.
All over the world an influence and power game made of the world a Tic-a-Tac table. For a moment, there was beleif in the end of Pathernalism, and on the other hand, willing or not, the end of submission made need of new icons.
Maybe 1968 is the simbol of the 60's decade, with it's changes in behaviour like the contraseptive adhesion, women, teenagers, partidary and black people rights.
By that time, it was said that the stronger would survive, but, Who are this stronger ones? The ones that lead during the moment we're looking? Not. It seems time is much bigger than our awareness of if.
In Brazil, the Military Dictatorship ruled with power, while the socialist or the politized resistance tried to mantain themselves alive, just like a fish, struggling for life when out of water, trying to go back to where it's free to live.
I think this kind of "revolutionary spirit" has become a part of, or at least something that bothers inside me.
1968 was a year that shaked the world. Maybe the anthitesis of a system. Though revolutions make part in history of humanity, that year has probably proved that people are not completely alienated, stactic.
All over the world an influence and power game made of the world a Tic-a-Tac table. For a moment, there was beleif in the end of Pathernalism, and on the other hand, willing or not, the end of submission made need of new icons.
Maybe 1968 is the simbol of the 60's decade, with it's changes in behaviour like the contraseptive adhesion, women, teenagers, partidary and black people rights.
By that time, it was said that the stronger would survive, but, Who are this stronger ones? The ones that lead during the moment we're looking? Not. It seems time is much bigger than our awareness of if.
terça-feira, 16 de março de 2010
Wednsday, May 7th, 2008
Begginings
To understand the present, some memories have to be brought back, should they be words or images... Sometimes we don't remember people faces, but we do remember their voices, senetences... It's interesting, sometimes we remember nothing but a smile, and this is something that always remain. It seem to comprehend the whole only by itself...
The idea of making a diary comes from the need of pure expression. to be able to tell, regardless of age or anything, a little of the stories of our pathway.
Writing frees the movement and replenishes the soul. I don't consider my life such a big deal for me to have my own diary, but it's peculiar since I passed my life trying not to become futile.
My name's not Cecília, but I see a lot of beauty and strengh in that name, and that's the reason I chose it as a pseudonym. I'm 39 years old, and i'm very confortable with it, as if each year is a butterfly that lands here, there, very far or deep inside me.
I'll try to tell some parts of my life that are organized in my memory...
The idea of making a diary comes from the need of pure expression. to be able to tell, regardless of age or anything, a little of the stories of our pathway.
Writing frees the movement and replenishes the soul. I don't consider my life such a big deal for me to have my own diary, but it's peculiar since I passed my life trying not to become futile.
My name's not Cecília, but I see a lot of beauty and strengh in that name, and that's the reason I chose it as a pseudonym. I'm 39 years old, and i'm very confortable with it, as if each year is a butterfly that lands here, there, very far or deep inside me.
I'll try to tell some parts of my life that are organized in my memory...
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